Your neighborhood Applebee's could be party central this festive season as it'll be arguably the cheapest place to get drunk in Minnesota.
Far from being the family-friendly institution we all know and visit less and less, their suburban eateries will be the site of wall-to-wall debauchery over the holidays.
At least, that's what we envisage after Applebee's announced it's bringing back its $1 cocktails offer for December – this time with the Long Island Iced Tea.
It follows the dollar margarita promotion Applebee's ran in October.
The restaurant chain's decision to offer a cheap pathway to drunkenness has prompted headlines like this one from Fast Company, which says Applebee's is about to sell "the cheapest holiday hangover from hell."
It's calling the promotion the "Dollar L.I.T.", millennializing a classic cocktail that in Applebee's version will feature a mix of vodka, rum, gin, tequila, triple sec, sweet & sour mix and a splash of cola.
Applebee's is a suburban chain not typically found in locations densely populated with nightlife, which means it's not usually an appealing choice for bar crawlers.
That's not to say you can't kick off your bar crawl at Applebee's and then take a Lyft elsewhere BUT ... the effort required to get to and from the restaurant will inevitably lead someone in your group to say: "We might as well get food here."
That's what it's banking on: making a (probable) loss on its cheap cocktails but resigning you to stick around to eat before you leave.
Meanwhile, regular Applebee's customers may be tempted to visit a little more often knowing they won't be spending as much as usual on drinks.
The chain is looking to get back to its roots after an unsuccessful period of upscaling to attract younger diners. The Street reports it's reverting to the cheaper deals, simpler meals and all-you-can-eat specials that helped make its name.
It's here I should point out that the only non-suburban Applebee's in the Twin Cities is on the University of Minnesota campus ... where it's gonna be a bloodbath.