The year is 2080. The Earth is a shadow of its former self thanks to climate change and endless resource wars. All that remains of the Twin Cities is the rusted shell of the IDS Center and Kris Lindahl billboards.
If you're unaware of the latest stunt in the advertising blitz to end all blitzes, the realtor with the impressive wingspan was seen this weekend flying over Allianz Field during Minnesota United's latest game.
You can add that to similar ads blanketing the likes of Twitter and Facebook, emblazoned on the side of Metro Transit light rail trains and buses, and taking up pretty much every billboard on major approaches to the Twin Cities.
You can't deny it's an effective marketing campaign since we're all talking about it, heck we're even writing a story about it.
One can only speculate as to the size of his ad buy given it's reached every conceivable crevice of the 7-county metro, not to mention social media. In fact we're pretty chagrined that a plucky, up-and-coming website like our own hasn't been able to get a slice of the action (hint hint, Kris).
"But why are you giving him even more free advertising, Bring Me The News," we hear you cry. Oh please, like there's anyone in the metro who doesn't know what we're talking about.
And it's not like the response has been wholly positive either, for everyone who says: "Hmm, I must sign him up as my realtor," there are probably 10 that say: "His face haunts my dreams."
The current campaign is centered on his real estate company making a "Guaranteed Offer" on a seller's home, something his firm started offering last year.
Earlier versions of the marketing blitz include the "Lindahl 2020 Campaign of Convenience" that proved similarly inescapable this past May.
At the time, Lindahl's PR team reached out to BMTN to explain the switch to "Lindahl 2020," saying that Lindahl "realizes the importance of having a marketing plan that reflects the topics people are talking about" – namely the 2020 elections.
He told the Star Tribune that he gets recognized all the time around the Twin Cities, but says ego isn't driving his billboards, saying "it's just that I've invested millions in my brand and it's working."
Who knows what stunt he has up his sleeve next. The Vikings season starts next month, maybe the entire roof of U.S. Bank Stadium (or should we say...the Kris Lindahl Stadium) will be covered with his smiling face, arms outstretched.
Hell, given the ubiquitous nature of his campaign, we wouldn't be surprised if Kirk Cousins takes his helmet off and it's actually Kris Lindahl.