Skip to main content
Updated:
Original:

Go ahead, have a little pun: Bull semen exporter wants your puns for 'bull-boards'

Author:

A Wisconsin-based bull semen exporter, which for years has drawn chuckles and groans with its pun-filled billboards on Interstate 94, is looking for new material.

You may have seen the wordplay of ABS Global, which calls itself a world leader in bovine genetics and reproductive services and technologies, on its double-sided "bullboard" near Madison:

"We deliver the male"

"Our genetics will improve your dairy heir"

"Don't have a cow without us"

"Don't udder anudder word, you had me at moo"

"Our sires do the lam-bull leap"

But writing all those witticisms is no easy milk run. The company has collected quite a catalogue of punny material over the years (click here for more of their work). Now they are looking for your help in a pun-writing contest.

Think you've got the chops to do a little ribbing?

Contest rules state that topics focus on ABS, dairy, or beef-related slogans, and a connection to these categories is encouraged: general, seasons, holidays, hunting, back to school and sports. Slogans are limited to 46 total characters or less, including spaces and hyphens. The deadline is March 31, with winners announced in May.

Company officials urge participants to keep it clean. A company spreadsheet that lists all the suggestions submitted over the years, from both employees and the company, has a "too risque" tab, the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel reports.

"There's probably a good percentage of them that won't be able to leave my computer," ABS marketing specialist Jan Francois told the newspaper. "I can't even repeat them."

Next Up

Rosaleia Shelton

Appeal to find 19-year-old missing from Bloomington

The teen left her home on Monday afternoon.

hospital, emergency room

Deaths of twin fetuses after woman was shot ruled a double homicide

The woman was shot in the abdomen in mid-September.

Payton Willis / Gopher Basketball

Gophers improve to 5-0 with win over Jacksonville

The Gophers are establishing momentum early in the season.

Anthony Edwards

Ant's massive slam leads Timberwolves to fifth straight win

The dunk didn't count, but provided the highlight of the night.

Cam Talbot / Minnesota Wild

WIld arrive late, Cam Talbot stays on point to beat Devils

Despite a 30-minute delay, the Wild picked up a 3-2 victory.

Screen Shot 2021-11-24 at 4.10.54 PM

Appeal to find 35-year-old missing from Oak Grove home

Police say he's not believed to be in danger.

vote, election

7 MN Republicans urge states to audit 2020 election results

There has been no evidence of significant fraud in any single U.S. state.

child vaccine pexels

How many MN kids age 5-11 have received a COVID vaccine dose?

The governor says the state has one of the highest child vaccination rates in the U.S.

police lights

Seven juveniles arrested in connection with stolen vehicles in Woodbury

Woodbury authorities have issued a warning following a spate of auto thefts.

police lights squad car dark - Unsplash

1 dead after driver crashes into stalled vehicle on shoulder

The vehicle stopped on the side of the road was unoccupied at the time.

Related